Ohhh where to start.... well i pulled out of the sale of the house without telling laura(my wife) so then when she finds out she comes into work and confronts me. Quite a scene and very embarrising, anyway basically i did it because i dont want to go to canada and want to stay here so now she is going to go back without me.
Oh how life can change in a day and its never going to be the same, its been so long since ive posted here but theres simply just been too much going on. Basically the marriage has been on the rocks for the last year and ive only been married a year. So it came to a head when i decided i couldnt go through with the sale of the house and pulled out at the last minute. Needless to say she wasnt happy and went through the roof and has since left for home in canada as planned but without me.
She left on thursday morning and here iam friday night sitting getting pissed as usual !!!!!
theres too much to tell on here but basically shes has given me doubts about us and to sell your home and move country when you have doubts isnt on. Its too much of a risk on something that your not sure about but she cant seem to see that. So she has made me an offer which allmost elays my fears but not quite and also doesnt stop the main factor in this, which is that i dont want to move from here. So here iam wondering what to do, what shall it be who knows?
You see if i go and it doesnt work out i come back here finacially worse off than iam now,and iam worse of now than when i first met her because we have seperated. So if icome back i probably wont be able to afford to keep the house that i still now own, basically i suppose iam chancing my house on this working out.
So there it is pretty much top and bottom of it apart from the exact reasons why i dont want to go which would take to long to type. So some more drink and passing out then wondering what i will do tomorow, will have to consult with some friends then make my mind up. Untill then id better go, dont know how long it will be before i post in this again.
P.S. sometimes i feel like my life reads like a bad movie something which is allmost surreal.
Friday, October 08, 2004
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Monday, September 06, 2004
busy busy busy
ohh dude how freaking busy am i, not long back from paris for my wedding anniversary(was good to get away needed the break)and iam straight into the shit of getting this house sold in time for moving to canada before october. stress, stress, stress dont get much chance to write in here either when she is lurking about id prefer to keep this private from her. anyway she is in london now with work(works for BA) so i have some time to myself.
first thing i did when i found out she was going away was get some beer in :-) she doesnt like me getting to drunk. so iam gonna sit here chill out and get pissed. the roofer has just left had to get one in because the surveyor for the house said there may be a problem with the roof. what a fucking prat he was kept prattling on and on and on sounded like a proper con artist thank god i only need him to get a quote. one things for sure i wouldnt use him to do my roof too much to write about but for sure he was a prat.
hmmm wrote quite a bit for me i dont usually know what to say in things like this feel like i could prattle on for ages here, maybe its because ive had alittle drink.i dont know anyway ill leave it there otherwise ill go on and on and on.
first thing i did when i found out she was going away was get some beer in :-) she doesnt like me getting to drunk. so iam gonna sit here chill out and get pissed. the roofer has just left had to get one in because the surveyor for the house said there may be a problem with the roof. what a fucking prat he was kept prattling on and on and on sounded like a proper con artist thank god i only need him to get a quote. one things for sure i wouldnt use him to do my roof too much to write about but for sure he was a prat.
hmmm wrote quite a bit for me i dont usually know what to say in things like this feel like i could prattle on for ages here, maybe its because ive had alittle drink.i dont know anyway ill leave it there otherwise ill go on and on and on.
Saturday, August 21, 2004
just finished work been a hard day and a hard week knowing iam not going to have a weekend. so there goes my weekend 11 days working straight then next friday iam off and going to paris for my first wedding anniversary. the first of many anniversarys i hope,anyway having a drink only 3 or 4 cans cos iam up early for work tomorow(this sucks)
anyway i got home tonight earlier then i told laura i would be home and shes not here, and sehs still not here dont know where she can be except maybe at a friends. hope she is ok and nothing has happened to her. not quite sure what to be putting in here havent done a diary before well i tried once when iwas about 11but it didnt last for long.
anyway ill give this a try suppose it would be nice to look back and see what you were doing amonth before and the feelings you were going through and all those other things that you forgot about.
anyway i got home tonight earlier then i told laura i would be home and shes not here, and sehs still not here dont know where she can be except maybe at a friends. hope she is ok and nothing has happened to her. not quite sure what to be putting in here havent done a diary before well i tried once when iwas about 11but it didnt last for long.
anyway ill give this a try suppose it would be nice to look back and see what you were doing amonth before and the feelings you were going through and all those other things that you forgot about.
Friday, August 20, 2004
First Time
ok my first time iam drinnking tonight had a hard week at work so i think ill leave any real ideas i want to put down till iam sober. allthough you allways think you have plenty of good ideas when your drunk!!!
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